How To Reach Your Writing Goals Like A Pro
December, 5th – a day when many memorable events have taken place in time.
December, 5th – a day when I decided to reveal the biggest secret…
Now let me start with some events that took place on this special day then afterwards I will explain what made me want to reveal the biggest secret.
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1492 – Columbus didn’t find anything better to do on this day than to discover Hispaniola (Haiti). Well… here I have to admit that he never asked me if I approved of his discovery.
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1782 – Martin Van Buren, the 8th President of the United States, was born. He succeeded to have me by his side. How could I not be when he was 5 feet, 6 inches tall… exactly like I am.
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1791 – Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart died. He was only 35 and left without finishing the Requiem Mass in D minor (K.626), which made me mad because I don’t like unfinished things.
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1901 – Walt Disney was born. Should I mention who he was? I am still watching Snow White, the cartoon for which he chose the perfect animator.
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1945 – Flight 19 (the dispatch of five TBM Avenger torpedo bombers) was lost in the Bermuda Triangle. Yes… the triangle has captured my attention since I was a child (I still have some research left to do on it).
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1985 – United Nations designated this day as International Volunteer Day for Economic and Social Development. Volunteers from all over the world can now make their contributions visible.
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2003 – The creators of Ninja Burger unofficially declared this day as “Day of the Ninja“. I still haven’t decided what I prefer… to be a ninja or to delight myself with a burger.
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Yes… December, 5th is really a day when many significant things have taken place. There were many more things that happened on this day, but I chose only a few facts to present to you.
Maybe you are now wondering, why exactly am I presenting these facts and what do I want to demonstrate by choosing them?
Well… let me explain…
In all the events that took place on this day, we can notice some common facts… they all have at the center of their attention the human beings we call “men”.
Men? Men… and again more men… They are everywhere.
But… today is also the day when I decided to transform myself into a Ninja and to Volunteer for revealing to all my male readers the best held secret that they can ever know… How to tame a woman.
How does it sound to you? Can you imagine… a world in which men can at anytime, anywhere, and anyhow, tame a woman.
Why do I call myself a Ninja? Because my female readers will surely be angry at me for revealing this secret, so… I will have to protect myself using some hidden techniques.
Now… let’s proceed…
Dear women, who will read the following lines… don’t shoot me, please!
Dear men, who will finally learn the biggest secret… read it and never forget!
10 RULES EACH MAN SHOULD FOLLOW FOR TAMING A WOMAN
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A woman is always right.
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Only the woman can change the rules, anytime, anywhere, anyhow, without any notice.
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No man can know all the rules.
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The woman is never wrong.
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A woman can at any time change her mind.
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The man has the right to change his mind only when he has a written agreement signed by the woman.
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The woman has the right to be angry anytime.
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The man has the right to always be calm, exception being when the woman wants him to be angry.
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The man has the right to be silent and to accept these rules.
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The woman always has the final word.
1. A man is always irresponsible, hence fun.
2. A man is very good at faking like he’s obeying the rules. This is his life purpose.
3. No woman can know what the man is thinking about during sex.
4. The man thinks he’s always right. This is good enough. Most of the times.
5. A man once he’s got a mind, will never change it, as he fears he might be loosing it in the process.
6. The woman has the right to change her body, but only according to men’s fantasies.
7. The man has the buit in ability to go into ADD mode whenerver he wants to.
8. The man has the right to always be calm, exception being when the woman wants him to be angry. (yup to this one!)
9. The woman has the right. But we’re not sure to what. Oh, yeah… to wear pants.
10. The woman always has the final word, and most of the time that word is YES.
Well done, Andy!!!
This is a great reply :))))
What can I say? You had me at number 1. And it’s only taken my husband 38 years to see this. Thanks for a fun read. You did know women would check this out, didn’t you. Of course you did. 🙂
hahaha… Anne… you made me laugh now.
At the same time you made me read the list again because… meanwhile I forgot which was number 1 🙂
Behind every good man, stands a woman telling him he is wrong! LOL!
So long that the man is actually wrong, then he should stand it. Otherwise, exact some of this equality these females are whining about 😉
The factoids were nice, the list was almost completely wrong. The only thing I agree with is the word “know”.
First… I am so happy to see you here, Tor-Arne!
Second… you just made me curious, my friend. Which is the element that is completely wrong?
Third… Thank you for stopping by!
“The only thing I agree with is the word “know”.” – Myself in a previous comment. The singular words “Know” was the thing I agreed with.
Which, of course means that the entirety of the list is void 😉
*word even.
Sounds interesting. Thinking of the definition of void as an empty space, my mind was invaded by the image of a black hole (of course I chose the variant that I liked most 🙂 )
Doesn’t this seem to be fascinating? To be so intense that nothing, not even light, can escape…. wow… I like voids 🙂
LOL… Mary… you pointed it out so well 🙂
I believe this design to be of some genius male engineer that discovered an element in the earth called “fe” and assigned it an atomic #26, the same as YHVH and found it to be very strong naming it Iron and called this creation female and gave total control over to her…. but who knows it may have been a female engineer that had to show him how to configure it. 🙂 Oh and one more thought.
I think the only law or rule a man needs to know is when to give input and this requires feeling her heart!
🙂 Very interesting theory, Lee. My ego is thrilled to read about engineers… especially about female engineers. Of course I always suppose that you are talking about the genius… me 🙂
Thanks my friend 🙂